Warrior Dash Wardrobe Malfunction

This slice came to mind earlier in the week after another slicer’s story about a wardrobe malfunction. Nothing more cerebral would come to my mind this evening so I am going to have to go for it…

I am hardly a warrior and my running is far from dashing but how could I resist a day of fun with friends from school and the chance to crawl through mud and jump over fire??? As we arrived at the base of the mountain hosting the event crowds of people of all ages and fitness levels made their way to the start.

As this is a race that is run in waves we could already see people covered in mud. We asked about the course and heard several choice words about the steepness of the course.   I thought, Uh oh! We are really going to be running up a mountain. I had secretly been hoping they would just set up the course around the woods at the base of the mountain.

Our team of seven lined up at the start. My good friend Trish was at my side. Trish is a good sport and when we do a race together she sticks with me despite my slow pace. The others were much faster and made their way to the front of the pack.

The horns blared, the flames shot up and we were launched up the mountain. The course immediately went up and up. I was demoralized in about 100 yards. I pushed on and had to keep walking and running. Trish waited for me at the top and the race moved along. Running when we were going down the mountain and walking/jogging when we were heading up.

The obstacles were nice diversions from the struggle of running up and down a mountain. About half way through we were jumping over a series of wooden barricades when I heard a pop. I knew it wasn’t a body part so I kept going. As I cleared the last barricade and started running I knew I was in serious trouble. The pop was an important piece on the strap of my sport bra giving way… I don’t have a physique that allows me to run without this important piece of running equipment.

I caught up to where Trish was waiting and broke the news to her. We went to the edge of the trail and the woods so I could survey the damage. There would be no tying the pieces together… not enough strap. We had a good laugh about my predicament before we began to think about problem solving.

First aid wasn’t an option as we were in the middle of a trail and there weren’t any other official looking people around. Mulling it over for a few minutes I had the idea of taking a safety pin from my bib and using it to pin the strap back together. This was easier said than done as the fabric I was trying to get the pin through was rather thick. Finally, I got it pinned back together and off we went.

I made it about 10 feet when I felt the lone safety pin give way and stab me in the shoulder. We had to stop again… this time we decided to use all non-essential safety pins between the two of us and pin the strap back together. It took the two of us 20 minutes to wrestle with the safety pins and strap to complete the operation. This was a bonding experience like no other.

I tentatively started off again and everything held. Trish and I made our way through the rest of the course without incident. Trish and I have run several other races together since but the Warrior Dash certainly set the standard for a wild adventure.

A few warriors at the end of the race.  I am in the middle and Trish is the cleanish one... not sure how she did that.

A few warriors at the end of the race. I am in the middle and Trish is the cleanish one in the white shirt… not sure how she did that.


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